I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
