Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize