Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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