dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
