I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize