You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
