She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize