You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
