I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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