This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
