It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
