Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
