Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
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