Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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