he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
