I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
