the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
