Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Is Oprah even human
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
