And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
