i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Randomize
