i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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