We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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