I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
