Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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