The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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