Texts From Last Night

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  (585): View more from New York

  i'm signing you up for texting rehab

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  (585): i'm signing you up for texting rehab http://tfl.nu/wf7t
  Replies (4) Good night (725) Bad night (845)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.

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  (406): my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick. http://tfl.nu/ik4i
  Replies (10) Good night (1123) Bad night (1897)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.

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  (801): Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list. http://tfl.nu/2ara
  Replies (129) Good night (2975) Bad night (562)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.

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  (410): 260 beers this month. I need a new hobby. http://tfl.nu/ixdv
  Replies (37) Good night (3809) Bad night (1496)
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  (831): View more from California

  Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.

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  (831): Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot. http://tfl.nu/f3j9
  Replies (20) Good night (6555) Bad night (1238)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"

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  (210): She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream," http://tfl.nu/rf9x
  Replies (8) Good night (3594) Bad night (1000)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy

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  (601): i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy http://tfl.nu/7bad
  Replies (6) Good night (739) Bad night (2129)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february

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  (732): if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february http://tfl.nu/tz00
  Replies (2) Good night (1253) Bad night (636)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving

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  (406): Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving http://tfl.nu/p7rm
  Replies (18) Good night (2241) Bad night (571)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.

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  (307): Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf. http://tfl.nu/cifg
  Replies (4) Good night (1000) Bad night (427)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them

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  (651): It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them http://tfl.nu/2gqy
  Replies (2) Good night (583) Bad night (372)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.

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  (541): People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized. http://tfl.nu/aj4f
  Replies (1) Good night (464) Bad night (360)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.

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  (732): My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places. http://tfl.nu/xqpe
  Replies (0) Good night (490) Bad night (319)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".

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  (920): We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started". http://tfl.nu/xqcg
  Replies (0) Good night (556) Bad night (297)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does

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  (203): Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does http://tfl.nu/jmm7
  Replies (3) Good night (822) Bad night (299)

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