meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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