I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
It's blow job season.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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