I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
