a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
