You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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