still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Someone signed my nipple.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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