We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He passed out mid-signature
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
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