He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
tell me about the eggs
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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