The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
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