covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
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you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
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i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
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