they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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