oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
