dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
