I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
