This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
i now understand why vodka
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
