id be glad to
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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