Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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