We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
