I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
and i looked up. we had an audience...
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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