and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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