This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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