Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.