And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I'm determined to sit on that face.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize