is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
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