he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
