I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
